All I ever wanted, growing up, was to be a mother. That was my big dream. My ideal occupation. But my dreams came crashing down when James and I struggled to get pregnant, and then when our first two pregnancies ended in miscarriage. After our second miscarriage, I really struggled. I couldn’t understand why this was happening. I didn’t know why God would allow it. I was devastated that what I wanted more than anything else – to be a mother – was slipping away from me and might never become reality at all. I went to church, but felt guilty because I was harboring doubts and questions. I had…

This has been a year of healing for me. Perhaps that’s ironic, since it is a year most of us spent sheltering from a global pandemic. But at the beginning of the year I saw that I was a shadow of my former self, and realized at last that the person I used to be was gone forever. I spent some time mourning that fact. Then I set about getting my feet under me again and striving to discover who I am now. I am now someone who lives with clinical depression/anxiety, and someone who has been affected by trauma. Those realities have changed my entire life, and this year…